Yesterday I was told that if I was any nicer, I’d have to wear a “doormat” sign. I was told it’s the nice people who are the ones taken advantage of, stepped on, forgotten about, or discarded and that’s why I’m so frustrated all the time – because I’m too nice. Because people who like to take advantage flock to “nice” people. Why? Because they think “they’re nice, they’ll understand” or “they’re nice, they won’t be upset”. Like blood in the water for sharks, us nice people are.
It’s true that “nice” attracts the users. I can count three times in the last week alone this has happened to me. And the excuse is always the same. “They won’t mind” is the universal self-talk of all people who step on others. What a horrific disfigurement of human nature to use, neglect, step on, or take advantage of a genuinely kind heart for no other reason than you think you have permission. Though proven to be reality, it’s a reality I’ll never be able to relate to or understand, as nothing in me desires to use or step on others no matter how “nice” they are. And I can’t even fathom the delusional narcissistic mindset of anyone who does.
But here’s something I do understand. I understand the principle of sowing and reaping. I understand that when you sow disrespect, that’s exactly what you will get in the end. And if you’re the person who steps on or over kind people because you think they they don’t mind, then I can promise you the same people won’t mind at all when you fall, fail, or need a hand. The same people you think don’t mind being stepped on now will one day step on you – and you aren’t going to like how it feels. And because you disregarded them, they will disregard you all the more.
So to all the users and abusers out there…just keep using “nice” people as your stepping stones, because soon enough those stones will rise and cause you to trip and fall and when you ask for a hand up, you’ll be left in the dust where you belong. So be careful who you use. Be careful who you take advantage of. Be careful who’s feelings and person hood you disregard now, because they’re the ones who will disregard you when the tables turn. And I promise, the tables will turn.